Was it yesterday we stood face to face and forgot who we were? A thousand glances could not compare to that feeling of having the world slip away. And I could have stood there for at least a day more and drunk every detail of your beauty, but it wouldn’t have been enough.
There are moments that make living worthwhile. That make all this coming and going seem a little rational and bearable. And it’s those moments that hold promise of new ones to come. So we wait, and we wait, all doe-eyed and expectant. Hoping the stars somehow align and that special someone bumps into us one day, like in the movies. Apologies are exchanged and there is that extra millisecond you’ll stare into each other’s eyes out of curiosity. But that is all that is needed. The spark has been lit and the only thing that will satisfy you now is being near that someone. Bodies, warm bodies.
Then the all-night phone calls. Sharing stories and laughing about silly things you would not share with anyone. ‘Cause you feel special and you want to be the best you can be. You finally feel understood and accepted, you begin to feel wanted, you begin to accept that things might work out.
Pretty soon everyone knows about the both of you. Some are happy for you, some are hurt for whatever reason and slowly slip out of the picture. You take it all with a grain of salt, knowing you are moving forward in life and something’s are for the best. Friends come and go after all, but that special someone is one in a million. Or so you think.
Thoughts, they make all the difference in the end. How you think of someone is directly connected to what you feel for them. You can hate someone, but if you still respect them for who they are, that hate is passive. You could love someone, but if you think you are better off without them, what use is that love?
The faces still smile, the aches still linger, the hopes still surface. What could one do with such tangible things? Put them in albums or words to be cherished forever? Or bury them in hidden places that will soon be forgotten? There is no right answer. There is only what you can tolerate.
Would you do it all again without fear of the outcome? I think you would. And it is precisely that courage that makes all the difference. Yes, you might not have got what you want. Things may have gone completely out of control and left you worn and disappointed. But you are still standing. You have lived through the worst possible scenario and you’re still kicking. You do not choose the failures that knock you down in life, but you do steer this robust vessel that is yourself. Even if you take on water, even if your anchor is torn away, even if your sails are shred to pieces, you’re still afloat, you’re still alive, and you’re still you.