Self-worth is a tricky matter. In this materialistic reality where everything comes down to appearance and wealth, uncovering what’s underneath is no easy task.

We read about how this celebrity’s lips are worth this much, or how much another’s posterior is insured for. This is hogwash and shouldn’t be circulated in the first place, but that’s the state of affairs as it is.

How we are perceived by others around us is important. It is not the basis by which we can gauge our effectiveness. People may depend on us, our children might be helpless without us. This will make you feel needed and even powerful. It bears no relevance on how you size yourself up when there’s no one around and you have to deal with life on your own.

Loving yourself does constitute self-worth. It is one part of accepting the flaws and the quirks and uniqueness that make you who you are. The drawback of living in a social structure is that we naturally tend to compare how much we have achieved in relation to others. This stereotype, harmless as it is, is the most basic cause for diminishing self-worth.

Looking up to yourself is not something one learns overnight. In fact, it is one of the most difficult journeys one can set out on. Hard work can help you achieve your goals. Grooming yourself to fit into your cliques only requires adapting. Finding a place where you’re comfortable boils down to opening up to new experiences so you find your niche. Giving yourself the chance to develop into the ideal person you want to be; allowing opportunities to pass you by that do not fit in with where you want to be; learning to stand up for yourself no matter what or who you lose in the process. These are important choices that will either inhibit or enable you to nurture what lies within you. There’s also the possibility of never finding yourself.

Integrity, impartiality, honesty, diligence, perseverance and humility are some qualities that might help you on your way. Or maybe deceit, conceit, disloyalty, vanity and greed are your mantras. We choose our own paths and ultimately realize what we’ve known all along: Becoming is being.



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